The Kaypoh Boy

Niko was installing the gate to be put at the kitchen door. This is to prevent Marco from entering the kitchen and play with the dangerous items such as knife and glass.

Marco was so kaypoh as if he would help Niko to install the gate.

Sunday Mass 28th June 2015

Today mass was about faith. The reading was about a woman who suffered for hemorrhage for 12 years and she touched Jesus robe. She believed by only touching His robe, she will be healed. She was healed after that. What we need is faith in God's power on our lives.

I hope by coming back to church, I will be stronger in life.

New Shoes from Taobao

I bought 3 pairs of shoes from Taobao. This is one of them. I like these shoes. It is very comfortable.

Growing Up

My little man keeps growing up. He understands more things.




I brought him to Compasspoint and bought him a set of crayon. At popular book shop I found someone left a yellow balloon. I quickly grabbed it and gave it to Marco. He was so happy with the balloon. He happily walked here and there with his new yellow balloon.

Sunday Mass 21st June 2015

I went alone this morning as Marco was not allowed to go.

The mass this morning is about Jesus who calm storm and wind. Jesus also will calm the storm in our life, it is just not instant. It needs time for Him to work it out. He will do it at the right time, on time. We just need to be patient.

We need to have faith that He will guide us in difficult time of our life.

Saturday Date 20th June 2015

We went to Vivocity. I brought a set of spare clothes for Marco in case he plays with water and he did.
He seems really happy in Toy's r us. He didn't want to go out from the shop even it was time for us to go home.

Sunday Mass 14th June 2015

Today mass talked about seed. It needs time to let the seeds grow to a tree. The tree will welcome any birds to rest on it. As well as the church also welcome any people from different race and back ground to come and attend the mass.

I was busy taking care of Marco today so that I was a little bit distracted. However I still listened about the catholic church that experiences significant drop in term of adult baptism. So the grow is considered slow. We normally blame catechist. In fact the father said it is our responsibility as a member of the church to reflect evangelism in our life and our responsibility to bring the good news to other people.

During communion, I was nervous as I carried Marco. When the lady said body of Christ, I was stunt. She needs to repeat again 2x till I said Amen. After that we went back to our seats. But still, he was bored already, so he kept making noise. I brought him to the infant room behind.

The first experience going to church with Marco was good. He behaved good. We arrived early and he was not even once crying. He was cheerful. Some grandmas liked him, called him. He looked cute with jacket and he walked here and there within a certain radius from me. During Eucharist, he walked in the middle of the aisle while sucking his water bottle. Luckily he never made any noise. I was so happy he was a good boy in the church today. He is lovely boy.

My Mom's 71st Bday

Yesterday was my mom's 71st birthday. I messaged her for her birthday. She told me a day before that she wanted to go to Sunter to order cake. She would have her birthday lunch with her friends in Haka restaurant Batu Ceper.



My mother in law also came to deliver a cake for my mom. They took picture together. I am glad they could get a long very well. I wish her a good health and happiness. Those are more essentials on top of others.

Definition of Happiness to Me

I read a book about Happiness. First chapter is about defining what happiness means for individual. Each person has different desire. If you don't know where you are going, that's where you will end up. So put down in words (in concrete terms) what you really want.

I think my happiness is to be with my family, to be together with the ones matter to me. It matters to me to have a place in a family where I am needed. I think the most miserable points of my life are always without this situation. I experienced the condition without money, but I could get morale support from the one I loved.

I hope I can always walk along to my goal.

How I Miss Baby M

I really miss my baby M. He is a toddler already. I can not kiss him as much as I want. He will run.

I love him as now he is able to express his feeling and interact with us. However I really miss him as a baby.

I looked back at his first few weeks baby photos. He was just very tiny, dark and fragile.

Requesting Something

My little man can shake his head when he does not want thing. He also can request us to do something for him if he wants it.

He always stands in front of TV, point at the on button, and nags saying Baba black sheep. He wants us to on the TV and play nursery rhymes for him.

Another thing is he stands in front of the cabinet, points up and says "Duck! Duck!". It means that he wants to get the duck on top of the cabinet and asks us to carry him in order to reach it.

Weekend Date with Mr.Gunadi Jr, 13th June 2015

I have been going out with him around the malls in south east Singapore. I think I began to enjoy dating with Marco.



My date was too tired he slept on the way home at MRT. As soon as I arrived at Sengkang MRT, I could not go home, I walked around Compass Point first and went to library. After he woke up, I rushed back home.

At home he somehow didn't want to be separated from me. He wanted me to carry him and only me pat pat him. He didn't want my helper.

I think as I put more time and effort for Marco, our bonding as mother and son is stronger.

Out of This World

I really remember about the TV series on the 90's about a girl named Evie who can stop the time.

I found it. The series is named Out of This World. Evie is a girl whose father is a planetarian and married with a human. The father went back to his planet and left Evie with her mother.

When Evie turned 13, she got the power from her father. She can stop the time and only the people she touches then the people can move. She touches her mother and her uncle only as they want to keep secret about her power.

Marco Slapped Me

Marco just woke up from his morning nap. He and I played at the TV area while Niko was preparing lunch.

He played with the pebbles and I didn't like it. I told him so many times to put the pebbles he took to the vase. He kept looking at my face and never obeyed. He suddenly approached me and slapped me on my face. I scolded him immediately. He was still angry and he slapped me again. I scolded him again. Then Niko came and told him to apologize to me. I was really sad. How could my 15 month-old son slapped me on my face. I always carry him to sleep, I hug him, I love him so much.

Sunday Mass 9am, 7th June 2015

I finally decided to make a come back after years away from God. I think this is a good move. The decision was taken last week. I have contacted Landings (a community to formally welcome people who want to make a come back). Before I do a lot of things, I have to take my first step to go to church first.

The mass was about communion with Christ. By receiving Christ's body (communion) we are actually have God in our heart. Communion means to become common union with. So by receiving communion we are expected to act according to God's will and reflecting His love in our daily life.

I really like the idea of communion as common union. I really hope myself can really shift slowly to be a better person.

Recording My Memory with Marco

I will continuously write about my journey with Marco. I hope this good memory can be passed to him when he is old enough to understand until the day I am no longer beside him.

I did admit that I didn't enjoy the things I had to do for Marco when he was 4-11 months. I think that was just adjustment period as a new working mother. As time goes, I really enjoy seeing him grows and everyday for him is like a new adventure. I bring him out to a date during weekend, order different kind of food for him to try. We went to different kind of place also.

I really want to show him our journey from gestation period, he already kicked my tummy, to the day I show him the story. By keeping this record, I can tell him exactly in detail what happened and how I felt. I see this as a life time project. :) What important in life is not only tangible things, memories create stronger feeling for people.

How to Win Friends & Influence People

This is the book needed by people like me. People who doesn't really understand other people.

The first 3 chapters are about fundamental techniques how to handle people.

The first chapter has slapped me on my face. This is just the first chapter. If you want to gather honey, don't kick over the beehive. I always make people upset or offended because I just say what I think. The very effective example of this chapter is about how Lincoln treated his General Maede. In stead of sharp criticism, he would think than he would have done what his general had done. Putting him self on other people's shoes is the way he solved problem. To vent our disappointment is a relief for us but it makes other people upset or feel hurt. Long story short, principle 1 is DON'T CRITICIZE, CONDEMN OR COMPLAIN.

The second chapter is not done yet but overall main idea is about people like the feeling to be appreciated. By threatening, you will not get the result you want. I may will, but that will happen only temporary. Praise and appreciation will motivate people more. Always see positive side even when you are in a very bad situation. Rockefeller still praised his partner Bedfort after losing a million dollar by a bad guy in South Africa. He saw the positive side of the event. He praised Bedford for still saving 60% of the money he had invested in. In every occasion, there is always a positive side. It depends which side you want to see. Whether the glass is half full or half empty. Principle 2 is GIVE HONEST AND SINCERE APPRECIATION.

I think every chapter is slaps on my face. I see how I can progress along the way.

Principle 3 is AROUSE IN THE OTHER PERSON AN EAGER WANT. Basically every one is just interested in their own business. Who cares about what you want. Everyone has a craving to feel important.

The second few chapters are about ways to make people like you.

Principle 1 : Be genuinely interested in other people. Like if you meet a biologist, ask question about his expertise. Or ask about someone's hobby.

Principle 2 : Smile. I think this one I have done it in office environment. It works.

Principle 3 : Remember that a person's name is to the person the sweetest and the most important sound in any languages.I need to practice this as often forget people's name especially if their name is in Chinese.

Principle 4 : Be a good listener. Encourage people to talk about them self. This one I think still ties in with the first principle about you interested in other people.

I will continue again next week. I think I have learned something on the way to office and home. I see my self use my time better rather than just browsing with my phone.

Emerging Grey Hairs and Other Shift

I am aware that I have this problem since I gave birth. All of sudden, there are so many grey hairs on top of my head. Recently I have been going through a stressful period, it may get worse. Grey hair normally will come out when you are late 30's for Asian. Other than that, it is considered as premature grey hair.

I looked at internet for this remedies. I will try to nourish my body with nutrient and see how it progresses. According to the article I read, the reasons of grey hair are stress and lack of nutrients. There is connection between low bone density and premature grey hair. I also felt that my back was painful. It's like my spine was not strong enough to support my body. I suspect either I sit too long during working hours or I have not enough calcium.

I immediately bought a bottle of calcium at GNC (90 tablets). I think it can last for 3 months. After taking it daily during office hour together with vitamin E, I feel my spine is not as painful as before. I read further yesterday in office while I was not so busy that actually I need to take 3 pills a day in order to cover the body needs. I guess I will take 2 pills a day for calcium and 1 pill for vit E. I actually need to take vitamin C for maintaining immune function in order not to fall sick easily.

Taking a good food with good nutrients is also part of my depression therapy. According to article I read, taking antidepressant medication is proven to create another problem leading to suicide. So I will take step by step to fix my body and mind. It is a process to get my self better.

In order to make people happy, I have to be happy myself. I made a move to try to enjoy every second of my life. I choose a book after
so long I never read one. I choose the one I never finished reading before, I read halfway and lost interest finishing it. The book is "How to win friends & influence people". I really enjoy the book from the first chapter. I really hope I can improve my life after reading this book. I read this book on the MRT during my long journey to office and on the way back home as well. I guess this is a better way to spend my travelling time rather than browsing my phone.

Saturday Date with Marco

I went to Vivo City with Marco this afternoon after lunch at home. We reached there around 2.30pm. Marco feel asleep not long after we walked around. He slept at Tangs to be precise.

During his nap, I went around shops, tried clothes (of course with stroller inside my fitting room) and see some restaurant to take note how the interior looks like. While I also trying to find some food for Marco's snack after his nap. The first idea was to get grilled salmon at Japanese restaurant, but the price was crazy. Then I checked out Poulet, they don't have salmon. But the price for braised oxtail was still more make sense than grilled salmon in Ajisen Gourmet Town. In fact Menya Mushasi has grilled salmon as one of their entree I felt a bit awkward to order that in a ramen restaurant.



We ended up at Crystal Jade. I ordered chicken feet, xiao long bao, liu sha bao, and siew mai for Marco. The food came a bit long. He was already bored waiting. He cried asking me to put him down. During dining time, he sat half way after that he wanted to go down. He ate 1 siew mai, a bit of chicken feet (I never thought it would have a bit of chilli), half of liu sha bao, and 3 pieces of xiao long bao (without skin). I packed the 2 pieces of liu sha bao as we could not finished the bao. The funny thing he said while waiting for our food was "hot!hot!". Our next table ordered milk tea but it came with dry ice as part of their signature presentation.


After eating, I changed Marco's diaper and also peed. We used the disable kind of toilet. I think Vivo city is the best place to hang out with baby. However during weekend, getting into the lift is difficult.

We reached home at 6pm, and it was just nice for Marco to have his dinner. I didn't have my dinner. I lost weight. I scaled on the afternoon, I was 56.6kg